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This week,порнография юные японки TikTok asks: "What's in a name?" OK, not exactly, but two name-forward trends dominated my FYP this week, and if William Shakespeare had a TikTok he’d be all over them.  

My name is…

TikTok users are ready to give up their personal information in this trend inspired by Breaking Bad. It pulls audio from Walter’s Season 1 confession tape, in which he says, "My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Aroya Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104." The clip was first posted back in October by @thehandmanz with text, but recently the audio gained popularity and now has over 14,000 videos under it. 

So, how are TikTokkers using the sound? They're captioning their videos with the bribe that would get them to confess in an interrogation while mouthing along to the Breaking Badclip. One example is @333beatrix's videothat reads, "when the police are interrogating me and offer me a dr pepper if i talk." The popular TikToks under this sound all feature similarly underwhelming enticements, which I guess isn't surprising considering all theprivacy concerns the app poses. 

The best videos under this sound are hyper-specific and relatable, like @missbeifong's video captioned, "when the russians say they'll tell me which couples in hollywood are only together for the PR." 

That's not my name

The latest earworm to be dragged back into relevance by a TikTok trend is "That’s Not My Name" by The Ting Tings. Remember them? Neither do I. What started as a way to reveal baby names and pet nicknames has become the go-to trend for actors — some of whom are teetering on the edge of irrelevance — to remind us of their many roles over the years. The likes of Drew Barrymore, Jessica Alba, Alicia Silverstone, and The Rock have participated in this trend. The sound has been used in nearly 1 million videos. 

The trend isolates the "They call me hell / They call me Stacey / They call me Her / They call me Jane" refrain of the song to coincide with an actor’s many character names. The idea being, of course, that these actors are often referred to as their most famous characters and not by their actual names. The trend has onscreen icons acting up!

Since this is a celebrity-centric trend the videos feel particularly inorganic, and watching them can feel akin to reading someone's resume. While it is fun to be reminded of an actor's beloved roles, the trend is a cheap shot at nostalgia and excludes those who make TikTok an enjoyable app aka normal people.

Talking to the moon

"That's Not My Name" isn’t the only early 2000s bop that's been brought back into cultural relevance this week. Bruno Mars’s 2010 song "Talking to the Moon" has become the soundtrack to a hilarious trend. The concept is simple: Users try to do a chore but "accidentally" do something else instead. As the TikTokker is going to do the thing they are supposed to do, they very obviously fake-trip and move in slow motion to do the other, more exciting thing. 

To be clear, these are things you can't do accidentally, which only adds to the humor of the trend and also speaks to how challenging it is to get stuff done in 2022. One of the funniest examples is @anjmeetsworld's videothat reads, "When you're trying to do the dishes but accidentally get a tattoo." Another video, posted by @queencitytrends, shows her tripping as she goes to make coffee and somehow ends up buying a drink at Starbucks. We've all been there! 

The best part of this trend is that people aren't even using the slow-mo effect. Instead, they are just moving reallyslowly, adding to the silliness of it all. TikTok is usually reliant on filters and transitions to create high-performing content, so this trend is a breath of fresh air and reminiscent of early viral videos when that tech wasn't readily available.

This is all to say: "Talking to the Moon" would have thrived on Vine.