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【???.?????.???.????.????????】Bluetooth sex toys and VR: how people are having sex in virtual reality

You load into a public VR world. At first,???.?????.???.????.???????? things seem pretty innocent — until you enter the sauna only a few steps away from the spawn point. Suddenly, you've stumbled upon a public orgy full of e-boys and e-girls with genitals larger than physically possible in real life. People silently sit and watch; who knows who these people are.

There are dedicated games for people to have sex in virtual reality, such as VirtaMateand AnthroHeat, but more often than not people are getting intimate on the metaverse social platform VRChat. Here, players are able to join over 25,000 community created worlds, most of which are innocent hangout spots while others are a breeding ground for horny gamers.

SEE ALSO: Buzzy CES vibrator looks — and acts — like a remote

There are multiple levels to sex in virtual reality, or as many call it, erotic roleplay (ERP). The first is not too dissimilar to phone sex: Players will talk dirty using the chat function or their voice while their avatars interact with each other. 


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A majority of VRChat ERPers, however, take it a step further by using Bluetooth sex toys to simulate what appears on screen. Mashable spoke with creators of tools that make this possible, as well as ERPers who utilize this technology to explore their sexuality. 

Making VR sex a little bit more real

ERPers use one of the many "dynamic penetration systems" that allow for their virtual penis to enter a virtual vagina, asshole, or mouth. This combined with full body tracking, which allows for every movement of your body to happen in-game, creates for impressively realistic looking sex. This experience may trigger someone's phantom touch— a phenomenon where users believe they can "feel" sensations in VR — which some claim they can orgasm solely from.

However, not everyone can experience phantom touch. In the absence of this, two tools (RealFeeland Buttplug.io) emerged that trigger Bluetooth sex toy movements from in-game events.

"Originally I made RealFeel as I lack phantom sense," Kanna, creator of RealFeel, told Mashable. "I felt nothing when I did lewd acts in VR. RealFeel was made to fix that for me."

Four months after Kanna created the tool for personal use, the project started to take off. Now seven years after its creation, RealFeel claims to have 2,800 Discord members. RealFeel is designed to only work with VRChat while Buttplug.iois an open source tool that can be adapted to work with any game — including Animal Crossing.

Every tool works slightly differently but, generally, they require the user to select what region(s) of their avatar they want to trigger their toy(s). Some tools require your partner to connect to your toy in order to activate it, while other tools allow anyone to activate the toy with touch. 

This GIF shows the configuration of a RealFeal breast sensor, changing the start and end of the sensor cone:

Via Giphy

"I created the first sex interface for Second Life, back in 2005," Kyle Machulis, the founder of Buttplug.io, told Mashable. "This is just a natural progression of something humans have been doing for decades already. People have been having sex in online worlds since the late '80s, early '90s."

Depending on your toy, the tools can translate complex inputs into complex outputs. At its most basic, this means a fleshlight understanding the depth your character has penetrated another. If you have one of the more complex toys (i.e. the SR6) you can adapt your tool to move up and down, side to side, rotate and twist, as well as lubricate and control heat.

"Bringing Bluetooth toys into it makes things interesting very quickly," John*, Director of Foxhole, a furry group that organizes ERP meetups, told Mashable. "VR porn becomes obsolete because you have an opportunity in VRChat to engage with other human beings. That's a deeper level of connection. It's more meaningful and more customizable." 

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80 percent of VRChatERP Discord members reported more intense orgasms when having sex in VRChat compared to watching porn—14 percent even reported orgasms more intense than real sex. 

Just H Party and Shangri-La are VRChat public worlds for foxy users to find others to have sex with. At Just H Party, people will enter lockable rooms before they get down and dirty, but at Shangri-La you'll regularly find people having sex in the public sauna.

Why have VR sex?

Many engage in VR sex due to social anxieties. One user told Mashable in Discord, "I'm an introvert and afraid of the real world so I'd rather explore myself online." While others love the safety of it: "There's zero chance of pregnancy, and there is zero risk for physical harm. If someone does something you don't like you can just block them, kick them out of the world, or simply leave," another user explained. 

"VR can definitely add a positive side to sexual exploration," Dr. Karen Stewart, PsyD, a sex and relationship therapist, told Mashable. "It gives a person the opportunity to explore people, sexual experiences, and try new things without fear of judgment – from themselves or anyone else. It's not permanent, no one else’s feelings are involved, and is truly safe sex because no actual body-to-body contact nor fluid exchange occurs."

This is just a natural progression of something humans have been doing for decades already.
- Kyle Machulis, the founder of Buttplug.io

As is expected, technology can sometimes stand in the way of immersion. VR sex replaces the awkward silence while putting on a condom with controllers running out of battery, and swaps ignoring queefs for ignoring the background noise of Discord notifications. 

There's also a cost. Players may be naked but they'll be strapped with a headset, 3+ trackers, headphones to prevent moaning blasting to your roommates, and however many sex toys a player wants to use — this could cost over $1,500 excluding a gaming PC to run everything on. 

Money aside, this is a great way for long-distance couples to connect in a deeper way than purple Snapchat messages. That said, hookup culture in VRChat is rife. "Getting your virtual dick sucked is easier than getting five bucks," one horny user explained.

Adult activities within an all-ages space

You only have to be 13 years old to play VRChat (as it's not strictly a sexual platform), so people publicly having sex are at huge risk of exposing themselves to minors when having sex or picking people up in public worlds.

Many users are hyper-aware of this risk, especially in the wake of the British police investigating a sexual assault in VR, so they run checks to avoid getting intimate with a minor. People in the Shangri-La sauna reported checking their partners bio, asking directly, and trusting their gut before engaging with another user. Unfortunately, these efforts just aren't enough to completely remove this criminal risk.


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To prevent children entering these spaces, communities form on Discord that require ID age verification. VRChatERP, for example, requires two pictures: one of your face and ID in the same picture and another with your ID and Discord name in the same picture. 

"We initially had less invasive requirements for age verification, which lead to almost daily issues with members being minors," Steve*, the founder of VRChatERP, told Mashable. "Ultimately, our method of verification is essential for ensuring that adults have no chance of sexually interacting with minors and vice versa. We haven’t had an age-related ticket in about a year."

SEE ALSO: Sex workers are cloning themselves with AI to make sexy chatbots

Exploring kinks not possible IRL

Each community hosts a range of different events, some groups prefer chilled meetups while others opt for flashy DJ-events with corners for people to ERP in. "I've joined worlds and the first experience I get hit with is a bunch of people moaning, it's quite surreal," one event attendee explained.

Just like real life, many people enter these communities and begin their slut era. Soon, they tire of this and start to play with a smaller group and explore new corners of their sexuality. Some slowly become more open to queer sexual interactions while others begin to experiment in kinks they hadn't previously considered.

"During ERP I may be more willing to engage in slightly violent kinks or kinks that would be not-good or downright unhygienic in real-life," a user who has been having VR sex for two years told Mashable. "The idea of being cut or stabbed during sex does seem really hot but it probably wouldn't be so great if I was actually hurt like that."

Kinks that aren't possible to safely explore in real-life are able to be explored in this virtual realm. For example, hard vore — the desire to be ripped apart before being eaten — can be explored if the player is skilled enough to make an avatar that can have its limbs removed with blood and gore.

"The downside of this fantasy fulfillment is that it has been found that people can become jaded to 'real world' sexual experiences." Stewart explained. "For instance, if a young person is experimenting with VR sex on a regular basis, exploring fantasies, things that will not happen in reality, when they encounter a real-life sexual relationship they may have erectile problems, orgasm disorders, or lack interest in real human touch."

In a virtual reality where your creativity and imagination can run free, the line between fantasy and reality become blurred. Bluetooth sex toys help deepen the immersion that what you're experiencing is real, allowing unrealistic kinks to feel like a new reality. 

"Don't get lost in wonderland. Know the boundaries between fantasy and reality," John pleaded. "Don't forget, at the end of the day, you're not some cat or dog or animatronic or fox girl. You're a human being with a life to live."

* Pseudonyms have been used to protect sources' privacy.

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