President Trump was wrong about former FBI Director James Comey: he's no showboat970 lingerie sex videos he's just a 6'8" emo teen.
Comey delivered a surprisingly emotional testimony on Thursday, making a special appeal to his former staff at the FBI. Comey spoke lovingly of the institution and the people who worked in it -- and it was strangely hard not to tear up, even though this is, you know, J. Edgar Hoover's baby.
SEE ALSO: How to throw your own painfully nerdy James Comey watch partyObviously, this is a profoundly serious hearing with lasting consequences, delivered at a critical time in American history. It's not a joke.
That being said, if Comey's looking for a new career post-FBI, he should seriously consider becoming a lyricist for Dashboard Confessional or, failing that, Death Cab for Cutie.
"And now to my former colleagues if I may: I'm so sorry I didn't get the chance to say goodbye to you properly. It was the honor of my life to serve beside you, to be part of the FBI family, and I will miss it for the rest of my life," Comey said.
Additional signs Comey is emo:
1. Writes in diaries
2. Avoids parties with powerful people
3. Great on camera
4. "Complicated"
5. Grieving the loss of the FBI and may never let it go.
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