The ?? ?? ??Bone Zone suddenly became a less amusing place Thursday when sleuths discovered the nation's favorite everyman had a somewhat unsavory Reddit history.
The debacle around Ken Bone's AMA highlighted an issue every sudden internet celebrity needs to consider: their digital past.
SEE ALSO: Yes, you can buy a sexy Ken Bone Halloween costume onlineWith that in mind, here are a few essential tasks for any fifteen minute celebs to consider in their first crucial seconds in the spotlight.
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Check - and maybe delete - your old tweets
These will come back to haunt you. Whoever you are, and however many followers you have -- or don't have -- you're bound to have tweeted something you would rather not be broadcast to the entire world.
It might be offensive. It might be something that could be misconstrued. Or it might just be really embarrassing, like endless tweets to Zayn Malik when you were 13.
Here's a detailed guide to deleting your old tweets, using the site's Advanced Search facility and tools like Twitter Archive Eraser. If you're really troubled by your past musings you can delete the whole lot.
Ken Bone got lucky on this one; he'd only sent one tweet to his seven followers before his count jumped to 241,000. And it was addressed to Ariana Grande.
@ArianaGrande You're a great positive role model for young girls and a big time talent,never let some image maker or muck raker take that!
— Ken Bone (@kenbone18) October 7, 2013
Make your Facebook and Instagram pages private
The minute your name becomes a hashtag, or most likely in the minutes before that happens, reporters will be seeking you out. And your family.
That ill-advised Halloween costume from 2011? Expect it to be embedded on a blog by lunch. Those old friends with stories from back in the day? Any one of them could squawk. So take a moment to do some housekeeping on your social media platforms and set your profile to friends-only. De-tag yourself from any unsightly images from 2007 too.
Here's a guide on how to lock down your Facebook page.
Create a new Reddit profile
You may find the quickest way to reach a load of fans is an AMA. If so, learn from the big Bone Saga of 2016.
Bone used the same profile for his AMA that he had before he become known across the country. The one where he commented in the PreggoPorn sub, admitted he committed insurance fraud and made questionable statements about the killing of Trayvon Martin.
So either ditch, or better delete, that profile and start a new one -- or be a better person in the first place.
With the social media situation locked down, what else should you consider?
Don't sell out too quickly
Ken Bone promoted Uber on Twitter this week -- reportedly for mere ride credits -- while Chewbacca mom gradually raked in hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of freebies, including Kohl's gifts and a trip to Walt Disney World. Then she started charging for autographs.
The offers will come flooding in, but make sure you choose the right ones and seal the deal quickly. Eyeballs are currency, and brands will be willing to pay big bucks to tap into the fleeting zeitgeist. With the ball momentarily in your court you need to move quickly and smartly. Maybe try and trademark the thing that made you famous.
Or, you know, tell them your integrity isn't for sale.
Don't keep wearing the outfit that made you famous
This is a tough one, because the hordes want to see you do your thing. But if you don't carve out some kind of public profile beyond the gimmick, your spotlight will swiftly go out.
Millions and millions tuned in to see Chewbacca Mom in the mask; fewer kept watching once she'd taken it off. Bone without a red sweater is just another guy.
Think of the long term
Life might be a whirlwind in those first few moments but there could be a long, albeit thin tail to your tale. Joe the Plumber has added war correspondent, media mogul and author to his resume since his flirtation with the public eye in 2008. Take a moment to consider your options carefully.
That said...
Know when to throw in the mask
There will come a time when no one cares. That time will be sooner than you think. It's OK: you were not famous before; you can be not famous again. Don't overstay your welcome. When the offers dwindle down to the cheap and/or sordid, say no. Go back to your quiet life. Be happy as a footnote in the sprawling epic of the internet.